Category Archives: News

Reality Check: A Rose Ceremony Won’t Make You Happy

Perhaps its deja vu, or maybe I’m just realllllly fed up with this subject, but this post (mostly rant) feels all too familiar to me.  I apologize if I’m boring you with redundancies.

WTF is up with The Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise???  I get it, these people crave 15 minutes of fame and the chance to be seen on the arm of a hottie (not in all cases so hot), but COME ON.  Admittedly, I am a die-hard fan of trash mags.  I love them and the normalcy that strikes me when reading about all the Hollywood drama.  However, lately I find it almost painful to give into the shiny, glossy lure. And all because of one OVER DONE topic:

Vienna.

UCK! Typing her name conjurs a teensy bit of vom.  #1 have you SEEN her? (I’m sorry, its not very ‘southern’ charming to be rude, but I’m conflicted by my natural tendency to be honest *bless her heart* (in the South if you say that before or after a jab, you’re covered) hehe), #2 do we care? #3 are we surprised?? only like 1 couple out of 400 have even remotely stayed together #4 legit, have you SEEN her?  (sorry, I’ll move on).  I mean we all knew it was going to end.  Didn’t we move on to watch that Ali girl he rejected ‘find her own rose lover?’   As if that isn’t enough, we have to be tortured with that ex Hooter’s biotch clogging up our gossip rags and blogs! No one cares, go home, go back to Hooter’s, I don’t care—just stop hogging my guilty pleasure with your tragic love FAIL of ‘he wouldn’t sleep with me’ and other yadda yadda I don’t give a sh*t sob stories.  Seriously, you’re not cute (sorry, I know I promised, it slipped) and from what I read you have no real personality so why in the world would you think I would care.  Also, you went on a reality show on live television looking for love.  Who’s the fool now.

I thought so. So take that Vie–what was her name again??

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Awesome things that hail from my birthplace…

I know many have stereotyped KY as a result of various comedy skits, rumors, ignorance, etc and so on…  I’m not denying that SOME are true, as I’m SURE is the case with every state.  To name a few:

-no teeth

inbreeding

-stupid

-redneck

-blue people

-we fry everything in lard (only the good stuff ;))

-yadda yadda yadda

You should realize that every single state has its own band of characters.  Despite the teasing at times, I love my upbringing and my inability to correctly pronounce ‘fly swatter’ (its sounds like ‘flask water’  and I can’t do anything about it, ask Mr. PC), and I love the roots that have made me who I am.  More importantly, this post is to indulge those who throw jeers with something truly awesome that has hailed from my home state (outside of the best basketball team ever, GO BIG BLUE!, and obvi the bourbon, horses and women)——THE KFC DOUBLE DOWN!

And, according to reports, it’s here to stay!  I actually tried it, why would I not, afterall, I needed to check out all the hype.  And, aside from the fact that I could barely stomach half, it was quite tasty.  I do not think it is wise to frequent this type of feeding, but go ahead, kick your boots off and have a taste!

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Kentucky Fried Chicken!

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Office Wasteland

In honor of this New Year’s Eve which falls on a Thursday, meaning some of you onesies and twosies may actually have to work today, I thought I’d share this great article from WaPo that highlights those sparse few who have to endure the week between Christmas and New Years at the office.  Hilarious!

For the workers, it was a lonely holiday week at the office

Happy NYE!

-DC Darlin’

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All Grown Up…Sorta

I had to share this, as I think this is absolutely fascinating!  If you’re going to miss out on many things we take for granted (roller coasters, adult clothing, etc.), it’s gotta be pretty cool to miss out based on the fact that you are the tiniest person in the world.  Am I the only one who thinks this is cool?…it may have something to do with my dream of finding a dog that stays a puppy forever.

World’s Shortest Person

~DC Darlin’

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Closing the Door on the Summer of Bad News

Being in DC has provided, among other things, an outlet for the “need to know now and before everyone else” side of me to grow and thrive like wildfire in Southern Cal. DC is such a fast-paced, news-centric city and this Southern extrovert can’t help but get sucked into the madness. For instance if you rode with me to work every morning you’d likely be listening to C-SPAN radio, as it provides a thorough commentary from guests that, in many cases, are making legislation just an arms-throw away from me (I still find this so awesome even after two years of living here.  Yes, I am aware that this incredibly nerdy.)

Another news-junkie action I promptly enacted upon moving to DC was enabling my FireFox browser with RSS feeds from CNN.com, as well as signing up for Breaking News emails to come directly to my Outlook.  So not only can I peruse the latest headlines at a nano-second’s notice, but I also know the late breaking news before everyone!!!! (insert BWAHAHAHA here). And of course by everyone I mean anyone less of a dork than me. Luckily though, there are many out there, ignorant to the vital information that they need to know, and that I, the news junkie, can provide.

What I did not anticipate when I began my swift decline into media madness, however, was 2009’s incredibly dismal summer of bad news! Between Michael Jackson, Jon & Kate, murders of parents with 8 kids in the house, and psychos hiding children in their backyards for decades, this summer has been an insane wealth of unbelievably bad news. Last week, after catching myself being sucked in by a horrific story about a couple of kids in the UK who nearly mutilated other neighborhood children (don’t go searching for it, it isn’t worth it), I finally decided enough was enough. I was ending the summer of bad news.

Now, I didn’t go as far as to remove my CNN feeds (although I thought about it). But I DID actually subscribe to another…allow me to introduce you to HappyNews.com! HappyNews finds the GOOD stuff going on around the world and puts it in one place so you don’t have to sift through the sicko junk to find it. I decided to now go to HappyNews for my ‘fix’ and only open CNN for legit information (and ‘legit’ does not include herrendous murders, sicko kidnappers, etc.).  There are so many great things happening every single day, and I hope to make a habit of becoming a junkie about these stories, as opposed to the media shockers that can so easily suck me in.  So on top of an incredible Alabama football team, my new consumption of good news should lead to a Fall of Joyful Elation.

smiley-face

~DC Darlin’

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Love is no joking matter…unless of course its on reality TV

Reality TV on trial again as ‘Megan Wants a Millionaire’ is canceled

I just stumbled upon the above headline and have to say that I’ve had enough (the fact that this guy is wanted for murder is the icing on the cake here).  I will be the first to admit that I enjoy crappy reality TV as much as the next person. However, I do not and have not ever taken any of the gazillion reality ‘let’s find you true love’ shows seriously (not even the one couple that is seemingly a success–Trista & Ryan).  My comment here is: Love is such a delicate and serious matter that it begs the question— is it wrong of us as a society to make a mockery of it with a cheap reality competition??? Reality’s answer: YES!

reality-tvI can see that The Bachelor and The Bachelorette at least TRY to make an effort so that it seems somewhat legit, but let’s be honest, just HOW successful can ‘true love’ be when it develops over 2 weeks in some lavish resort in front of a parade of cameras. Exactly.  And let’s not even discuss the not-so-reality-for-most-of-us shows that lock people in a house with gallons of booze and embarrassing contests.  I am guilty of watching reality TV by way of Project Runway, ANTM and American Idol—but I draw that line at shows that promise to match make. Furthermore, these shows give us unrealistic expectations of “love.”  These men/woman are given studio $$ to present lavish gifts and getaways to create the perfect fairytale–ON CAMERA.  I know that a few years back some might have thought the same of internet dating, but I have since had changed opinions (mostly from attending a few weddings as result of on target virtual matchmaking)—but people, let’s face reality, LOVE isn’t something to be found on a by-the-budget-for-seasonal-ratings contestant show.  Love is a battlefield, not a studio set. 🙂

-Big Apple Belle

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Uncouth Moment of the Week: Dear Alabama, 1925 called. They want their ass backwards legislation back. Thanks, ~DCD

It’s news like this that makes me want to move to Maine.

It seems the state in which I was born and raised (for better or for worse…it’s the latter today) has banned a bottle of wine because its label features a naked nymph. Now, I can’t decide what is more disconcerting: the fact that a wine label derived from a piece of art created in 1895 could be banned from an entire state through legislation created in 2008 or that the Alabama state government is dumb enough to think that wine labeled with a revealing picture is somehow more libationary than wine labeled with any other photo.

While there are many things that I love about the South, there are a few that I absolutely loath.  In this case, it is the completely archaic and backwards ideas, poster1opinions and convictions of many narrow-minded individuals who have seemed to congregate and vote each other into office in the lovely region that I call home. How this idiotic bill made it to a law, I’ll never know…I’m almost inclined to think that the state government’s goal in life is to keep the stereotype of Alabama alive in the hearts and minds of the rest of the nation.  Perhaps they’re hoping for some sympathy funds from the Department of Education or something?  “You Alabamians are so incredibly idiotic that we can’t help but direct more funds for education to your state. Perhaps in 10 years, you just may produce legislation that puts you within at least 30 years of the rest of the nation…at least, that’s what we’re hoping.”

Alabama government, news flash: we’re not in 1925. So stop acting like it. We’re intelligent, charming, creative and a ton of fun.  Now, why do you have to make us look like we forgot to turn our watches forward 90 years?!? Get a life and focus on something that matters; God knows there’s enough real issues in the state to warrant much more attention in Montgomery than a damn wine label. Thank heavens that at least Alabama has football…otherwise we’d have nothing to take our attention off of the circus in Montgomery.  September has never looked so good.

~DC Darlin’

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